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Short but Good Ones- Enjoy

Mistress Gatta
לפני 19 שנים • 24 בנוב׳ 2004

Short but Good Ones- Enjoy

Mistress Gatta • 24 בנוב׳ 2004
>
> My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.
>
> -Henny Youngman
>
> --------------------------------------------------------
>
> My wife and I were happy for twenty years.
>
> Then we met.
>
> -Rodney Dangerfield
>
> -----------------------------------------------------------
>
> A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
>
> -Milton Berle
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------
>
> I bought my wife a new car. She called and said,
>
> "There is water in the carburetor."
>
> I asked her , "Where's the car?"
>
> She replied,"In the lake."
>
> -Henny Youngman
>
> --------------------------------------------------------------
>
> The secret of a happy marriage, remains a secret.
>
> -Henny Youngman
>
> -----------------------------------------------------------------
>
> After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband,
>
> "You know, I was a fool when I married you."
>
> The husband replied,
>
> "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
>
> -------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> When a man steals your wife,
>
> there is no better revenge
>
> than to let him keep her.
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------------
>
> I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months -
>
> I don't like to interrupt her.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate.
>
> So I got myself two girlfriends.
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided
>
> not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did.
>
>
> -------------------------------------------------------
>
> Man is incomplete until he is married.
>
> Then he is finished.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> A little boy asked his father,
>
> "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
>
> The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa,
>
> a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
>
> Dad: That happens in every country, son.
>
> --------------------------------------------------------
>
> Then there was a man who said,
>
> "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married"
>
> then it was too late.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."
>
> The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same:
>
> "You can have mine."
>
> --------------------------------------------------------
>
> A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a millionaire."
>
> "And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend.
>
> "A billionaire." she replied,
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
>
> Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> It's not true that married men live longer than single men.
>
> It only seems longer.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> Just think, if it weren't for marriage,
>
> men would go through life
>
> Thinking they had no faults at all.
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> A successful man is one who makes more money
>
> than his wife can spend.
>
> A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> A man meets a genie.
>
> The genie tells him he can ask for whatever he wants,
>
> But his mother-in-law gets double of what he gets.
>
> The man thinks for a moment and says,
>
> "Okay, give me a million dollars and beat me till I'm half dead."
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage.
>
> They've experienced pain and bought jewellery
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it
> Just Once.
>