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I'm all anxious and irritable, I don't like it. I keep thinking about old shit I should have long put behind me.
I feel petty and small and insignificant. I want cuddles but it's too hot and the air-conditioning leaks.
Maybe tomorrow will manage to shut my brain a little.
I asked the girls if they want to go to oradora on Saturday.
I feel weird to be back in a party mood, it's been a while.
I'm already dead, completely flaccid, passive, entirely devoid of spirit and force.
I don't want to do anything, I don't want to talk with anyone, and it's been like that for quite a while.
What will I do if that changes? If my mood swings hard to the other direction? It might. It has before. I rather stay dead.
Do I?
Yeah, I do, I rather have no energy then to much to handle.
I'm pretty sure.
Maybe.
Maybe.
פאקינג ישראבלוג.
מי היה מאמין?
אולי אני לא צריכה את הכלוב בכלל 😅
יש לי משימה ללימודים לכתוב מניפסט.
אז אני קוראת שוב את האול של אלן גינסבורג.
זה הביא אותי למסקנה שמניפסט כזה צריך לכתוב על משני תודעה פסיכדליים.
אבל יש לי רק עוגיית וויד.
בהצלחה לי.
How do I make it look like an accident?
Obviously posting about it doesn't help, but no one knows about this place, hopefully they won't think to check.
I can clear my history.
But it's crucial no one thinks it's on purpose.
Any ideas?
I'm just so sad.
I feel like doing something stupid.
I don't want to go to school.
Or talk to anyone.
Or leave my bed.
Who's sending me a massage already? Weirdos.
Can we go back to when society stopped functioning?
Those are easier times.
I want to change my nick back, this makes me uncomfortable 😥
Why won't you let me? 🥺🥺🥺
