המתת השור

and i have these love scrambles again. it is not serious
one night and it is enough to melt my heart
quite parralling it, was another terrible letter of seperation sent to my ex where i did not mince my word or rather my
lawyer did not mince his work expressing so well what i have suffered for the last four years
he saw me crying when he only mentioned the name of my ex
i just could not fathom the idea of seeing him or hearing from him
and finally, this truth was said in a simple, direct, truthfiull manner

and then, last week, there is this man appearing in my life.
a body like a young athlete.
but it is in these small boyish bodies that you find so much of masculinity
my ex had that quality as well.

i often wonder what makes a man feel so bewitched by a woman
but the contrary could be so true to.
i was bewitched by the color of his skin
by the tatoo on his arm
by the softness of his skin
by the taste of his nipple
but the strength of his kiss


i was bewitched and he gave me the control
but am i in control really i dont think so
i am not sure even if he understands ne

so is it all what i am suppose to live : one night on long sensuous love making
so much sensuality that it seemed that love was there.
but can love be there. ?
i dont know
and all the odds are against me

another simple reason to cry tonight
life is unfair
i would have loved to keep this lover in my arms
a little while longer
do i really have control ?