המקום שלי

You can spend days and weeks maybe even months before you get to know someone, before you feel comfortable with them, or it can just happen.

I confess I have had more than a few conversations with people but never get over the initial fear and speculation to actually go that step further, my gut will tell me to back off. I may even try to prove my gut wrong, its rare when your feelings and doubts just fall into place.

A total stranger can make you feel at ease, you just know you can trust them. Maybe with you the doubt lasted all of the drive it took me to get to you, maybe it was never really there. I wondered as to your intensions, I still do, I need it black and white, but at somepoint you made me realise that we need to go with what feels right.

One look at your smile, I somehow feel safe, and that is the core of why I am where I am.....to feel safe, I have been a nomad wondering between insecurity for way too long.

I give unconditionally with the hope that oneday someone will appreciate me enough to give it back to me, but till now it I have not had the priveledge to really experience it (maybe once in my lifetime). The unchartered waters of having someone put me first..It doesnt make you less of a man, it only draws me in more.

I want to close my eyes and let the energy take over, I dont want to fight it, like I usually do.You touch me like you know me, you read me, and I can succumb to the passion inside me and not worry about what will be tomorrow. It doesnt mean I won't, it doesnt mean I dont hesitate, but my gut tells me I wont need to guess, you will tell me.

When I talk you listen, because knowing me is part of your charm, I am not used to the spotlight, not sure how much to open up, how much to let you in. I wish you would tell me, but at this point do we even know?

I may be scared to feel, because when I do I become vulnerable, and usually dissapointed. I dont want to let the wall down, but I want to learn, even with the doubt and confusion nothing here tells me to walk away.

You captivate me...