In the Pink

It's amazing how one asshole can ruin your whole day.

I have mentioned in these pages, I believe, of the pack of wild bitches masquerading as 7 and 8 year old girls at my kid's school.

Well, here's a newsflash, folks. Their mothers are no better. As bitchy, and as manipulative, with high-handed manners -- if such a word is appropriate -- and a superior disposition that not entirely justified. OK, screw it -- it's not justified at all.

First communique from the new va'ad kita reads -- and I shit you not, gentle reader:

"Following the parents meeting on [date redacted], dues to the va'ad will be XXX NIS this year.

An increase of 33%, but that's neither here nor there -- as the past summer has demonstrated, life is fucking expensive these days. But I digress.

"For those who have not yet paid these dues, please ensure that you send your child with the money in an envelope tomorrow."

The emphases are mine. "Not yet paid?!!" Are you fucking kidding me? Who the fuck do you think you are? I'm not your bitch, bitch.

Fumingly angry, I wrote back, utilizing the most powerful written tool e'er invented: the smiley. I mean, who can get angry with a smiley? A smiley is the cornerstone of righteous passive aggression -- because in a case like this, one can only fight fire with fire.

Note and disclaimer -- under no circumstances are ALL smileys passive aggressive. They just can be. The beauty is that whether they are intended as PA or not, it's always plausibly deniable: "PA? Moi? I was making a joke -- honestly. :-)"

Dear [name redacted],

Daughter o'mine will bring the cash to school tomorrow, and I would like to take this opportunity to wish all of you the very best for a successful year on the va'ad.

(I only "hadn't yet paid" because you hadn't yet told me how much. 😃

בכבוד רב
לילי וון שטופ


Well, honestly. And I was having a stonkingly good day until that email. Now, I'm feeling bitey, and I need to work off some aggression. Volunteers for a good spanking, queue up in the comments section please, safewords and hard limits at the ready.

😄

(Note: See above non-passive-aggressive smiley. Here's another. 😃