[Insert Clever Title Here]

Someone recently asked me how I would define a BDSM session. After giving it some thought, this is what I have concluded*:

A session is a sexually infused activity that involves domination and violence (either mental or physical or both). It has the appearance of an assault, but it is actually consensual – though not scripted. Think of a pre-session negotiation like ordering at a restaurant. The masochist offers the menu, while the sadist selects the meal.

I would say that there are, in fact, at least three types of sessions:

a. Private
b. Public
c. Performance

The private session is an encounter without spectators. It can be with a lover, a few trusted partners or a pro-domme. These are serious sessions, and they usually involve lots of intimacy, nudity, and sometimes sex (though not with a pro-domme).

By contrast, the public session involves spectators, often in a club. When playing with a stranger, sessioning in a club is safer than going back to his place. Also, it keeps things from getting too intimate. Finally, there’s the thrill of exhibitionism.

In the performance session, participants also show off their skills and advertise themselves to potential partners. But the performance is mainly meant to entertain the crowd, especially the tourists. It might also give the audience new ideas about what they’d like to try at home.

(*I welcome additions, amendments, corrections, etc.)